I’m Ok, You’re Ok?

“I’m o.k., You’re o.k.?”
In the 1968 self-help book, I’m o.k., You’re o.k., author Thomas Anthony Harris characterizes the “Parent” state of being in a less than positive light. In the Parent state, one is likely to focus on rules and admonitions and to use judging words based on what Harris characterizes as archaic value systems. Despite its basis in dubious neuroscience, I’m o.k., You’re o.k. was a New York Times Best Seller and influenced a generation of intellectuals, artists, and others.
The question for us is, “Are you o.k. with being just o.k.?” Christians are called to excellence – what we would call sainthood – not to being just o.k. We are called to the adventure of the nearly impossible, like forgiving 70 times 7 times – each day! We believe in holding ourselves to very high standards, and to lovingly helping those around us to do the same, knowing that our ever-merciful God is there to pick us up when we fall.
Sometimes Jesus’s call to love one another (Jn 15:12) is mistakenly taken as a call to blind acceptance of others’ behavior and an atta-boy to our own, no matter how messed up. But to believe this is to ignore so many cases where Jesus called his disciples to total commitment:
In Matthew, Chapter 18, Verse 22, Jesus says: “There is still one thing left for you: sell all that you have and distribute it to the poor . . ., then come, follow me.” In John, Chapter 16, Verse 24, Jesus says, “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.” These are not wishy-washy, just o.k. kinds of demands.
But if love is “willing the good of the other” (St. Thomas Aquinas), our kindness cannot morph into blind acceptance. This is not love; it is laziness and cowardice. Let’s turn our backs on the blandness and laziness of “o.k.” Let’s hold ourselves to God’s divine standards, praying each day to be better than the day before.